The 10 Songs that I'll never change the station when they come on

Like the title says.

Y'know how sometimes you can love certain music, but it gets to a point where you've just heard it too much. You switch it off half way through the song, try to find something else. Then there are songs that no matter what you are going to listen to from the very beginning to the very end. I am no musical professor, not a singer, songwriter, in fact I know really nothing about music other than I enjoy listening to it. This is my list. Your list might differ, but my list is bettah.

10. Sweet Child O Mine- Guns and Roses

I always forget about this song, then I'll hear it somewhere and it will get lodged straight into my brain and stick there for weeks on end. Even with my genetic inability to dance I still can't help getting up and cutting a rug when this one comes on. Also-Axel Rose. Or Axl Rose. However you spell it. The man isn't the least bit attractive, and he screams like a banshee, but...Axel!

9. To Be With You- Mr. Big

Who else thought the lead singer was a girl?

8. Get Down to It- TBTBT

There's like a 99% chance that you wont know this song if you aren't Canadian. They were like a kiddy rap/R&B group from Toronto/Mississauga. Kinda like a loseresque Kris Kross. Well, more loseresque.

This is kinda cheating too, as you'll never hear this on the radio. BUT if it did come on, I'd not only listen, oh no! I'd have the windows open, blast the music and sing at the top of my lungs, possibly causing the death of other motorists.

7. Stand Up- Ludacris

Yet another song I haven't heard on the radio in quite a long time. Its fun, and it makes me laugh. Its not serious, not aggressive, and makes me want to shake my pasty white arse. Also "BLAH!".

Also also, this one could go on a favorite video list too.

6. Runaway Train- Soul Asylum

I'm pathetic. I hate children with a passion. If a kid fell on the street in front of my car I wouldn't even swerve, I'd claim it was a suicide. 3 year olds do that all the time right? Then this stupid song comes on, and all I can think of is the missing children. Their sad little faces flashing on the screen. The fact that most of them are probably dead. The tears start welling up. My voice starts trembling. Next thing I know I'm bawling irrationally over people I don't know, because damn it...its just so sad.

Also, I thought this singer was cute when I was younger.

5. Sliver- Nirvana

I was 14 when Cobain died. Right at that age where angsty rebelious music was the thing, and Nirvana was so hot. Despite that I never actually liked them. I found there music to be...well, boring. It wasn't until a while later I heard this song, and finally decided to give Nirvana a try. I still hated them, but this song stuck with me. Its about nothing, and I like that.

Also it paints a picture in my mind of me sitting in a small room, with wood paneling on the walls. Not 100% sure why?

4. Karma Chameleon- Culture Club

Shut up, you so love this song too!

3. Jump Around- House of Pain

Yep, this one too. Someday this will be a classic. We'll be seeing House of Pain on oldie albums when were all back in diapers.

2. Jesus Walks- Kanye West

It just is catchy. Bum bum bumbumbum! Unfortunately the message of the song seems to be solely delivered to African Americans, when if it really could have been applicable to everyone. Or maybe the use of "The N Word" is just sensationalistic? Maybe I'm just missing something.

1. Billie Jean-Michael Jackson

This song is almost 30 years old. I had this record as a baby. I can not even begin to start-its just an awesome song. Admittedly, when I was young I had no idea what the song was about, but that didn't stop me from breaking out my best Michael moves.

Also, this video is terrible. What the fuzz is going on?

I must have stopped listening to music mid 2005...

I was watching one of those "Best Of..." shows that was running down the best music of the 2000's. I was having fun, singing and dancing along. Then it hit mid 2000's and suddenly I knew about 1 in 10 songs.

When I watch these lists for the 90's and even the 80's I can sing along with every song. No prob. Has music changed so much, or is it just an age thing? I used to wonder about my parents; how could they only listen to their boring old music, why not listen to the new stuff? Now I understand, its crap. It must be universal: if its not from your generation its total junk.

Whats with all the rappers being "Lil'" this and that?

One of the few things I don't hate: Salt N Peppa

I was in my early teen years when S&P really hit the big time. "Lets Talk About Sex" and"Push It" were already big enough songs, but they were a little in the past. Not that classics such as these could ever loose there fresh flava, but times were changing. I was getting older, S&P were getting sexier (and how could THAT be possible!).

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qzfo4txaQJA

Let me paint you a picture: its 1991, a pale white string bean 11 year old girl is sitting down to enjoy one of her favorite shows, Blossom. The show goes well, somethings happens, Dad gets mad, big nose cries, fast talking friend shows up. You know. the usual. Then suddenly, for reason that to this very day I can't fathom, two black women invaded Blossoms living room and starting singing about sex. My pure Christian values were shocked right out of my neon yellow socks. Rapping? Sex? Black People? Oh My...

It wasn't until a year or two later, when I was old enough to start watching Much Music with interest that it really hit me, the awesomeness of all things that are S&P. Why? Seven words: Shoop, None of Your Business, Whatta Man. Instant classics.

My 7th grade dances were constantly bopping to these tunes. Everybody was singing them. It was cool, you had to do it. I desperately wanted this album. It was a no-go with my mother though. There was no way she was wasting her money on this kind of garbage. Sadly I lived without until late 2006, when I found it for .50 at a Flea Market. So, yeah, I kinda forgot my love for them for a while, but when I saw it...how could I not lay down those two quarters and own it. I drove all the way home blasting it, my Buick Century shaking with the pure raw vibe of Salt's lyrics, Peppa's manly voice, the other ones...whatever she did.

From what I've learned (by barely looking at all) is that Salt is now uber religious and some sort of Minister? Good for her I guess. Peppa, who I think was in that "Lets live with 10 shitty celebrities" show, looks a lot better than she did back in the day. She's had work done no doubt, as her face no longer looks like it was pounded by a 2x4. She actually seemed pretty decent in that show, but when S&P had their own show she was a total biatch. I'm thinking she was either A) replaced by a Robot, B) Replaced by a Tranny, C) Replaced by a Tranny Robot. No idea to what happened to Mrs. Dash, or Spinderella or whatever she was called.

Join me, relive the early 90's. Lets all Shoop
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UKaVBVikysw&feature=related

And hey! En Vogue! What the hell happened to these chicks?
I like the one in the overalls, I thought she was pretty when I was young.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8-WFNbMohTQ&feature=related

I hate people who don't leash their dogs

Seriously, they piss me right off.

I'm out walking today with my dogs, minding our business as usual when this idiot yellow dog comes charging at us from God knows where. The owner was a good 50 feet away yelling "Come Hercules!" to no avail. I, with my 5 dogs, was desperately trying to keep moving down the road and get away from this beasty beast dog before my beasts ate it.

If you can't control your dog, keep it on leash.

Good God- How do you edit on this thing?

Seriously, anyone know?

I'm in the edit section, but I cannae do it!

Damn computer crashed, almost lost all the earlier snark. Now can't edit it. I'll have to continue my movie reviewing tomorrow.

So:

4. Edward Scissorhands- To Be Continued!

Watched Movies all Damn Day...

I hate days like this. Nothing to do, but it still seems like I'm wasting my time. Its so very rare I get both days in the weekend off, I feel like I should have made more of my free time. Instead I sat around watching movies. Now Imma sit around telling you about them.

1. A Nightmare on Elm Street: The Dream Child.

I was a bit sheltered growing up. Never was allowed to watch horror movies. It sucked as a kid, though now a days I can appreciate my parents being careful. I'm so shocked when I visit a friends house and we watch some gore fest piece of crap and they blissfully allow their impressionable five year old to watch along. The point of this: I didn't catch my first glimpse of Krueger until I was in my early 20's.

Sure, I knew who he was. Every kid did. I knew the basic premise of the movies...and I'm sure if I had seen it as a child I would have been terrified. I have to admit that when I finally braved meeting Mr. Krueger I was sadly disappointed. I purchased and watched the original, and I will admit it was more for the JD factor than anything else. It wasn't horrible, but it wasn't this mass of terror that I had been led to believe it would be.

I never bothered to see any of the other "Nightmares".

One day I was browsing the $1 bin at the local Zellers and low and behold: Nightmare 5! Since it was one of the few movies in the bin I'd ever heard of I bought it...and let it sit in my cupboard for over a year. Aging it doesn't help it turns out.

So much like the other NoES, Freddy is attacking kiddos through their dreams. However, some point in #4 this Alice chick beats Freddy and makes it so he can't come back. Freddy, being the clever hunk of man meat he is, finds a loop hole. He can attack again...through Alice's ugly ass creepy unborn child. What follows is basic, classic Krueger killing. Then it ends. What were you expecting?

I have to mention that other than Robert Englund I've never seen a singe one of these actors before. There's good reason: they are all terrible. Terrible, terrible, terrible. Did I mention Alice's kid is super creepy? Also, her father looks like John Turturro (but he isn't).

I would give this a whopping 4/10. But that's pretty generous.

2. PIN

Noisy, creepy Dummy sex. Crazy bother/sister relationship. Nut case parents. Please, don't watch it. You can't get that time back. Go outside. Enjoy the fresh air. Forget I mentioned this movie at all.

So you're still reading this? Defying me? Me? This masterpiece was from the very same $1 that the above classic was from. This one was recommended though. A friend, not a good one obviously (as only an enemy would expose another person to this toxic waste), said I needed to see this. For a whole dollar, I believed her.

I'm not rehashing this. I love weird crap, probably more than the next person, but this is just to...cruddy. The DVD case is nice though. I like the movie poster, it has that classic 80's horror look to it.

Also the Father was on Lost, playing John Locke . Yeah. I only watched the first two seasons of that show though. I wonder what happens to him?

3. Sixteen Candles

I love The Breakfast Club. What child of the 80's doesn't? Seriously, I'll hunt the mofo down and kill him. Sixteen Candles is, unfortunately, not The Breakfast Club. Its still a good movie, very much an important part of the whole "Brat Pack" timeline.

The rundown: Sam (Molly Ringworm..Ringwald!) is super sad! Why, you ask? She has so much going for: awesome 80's garb, girl next door looks and flaming red hair in an ugly boycut! How can she not be walkin' on sunshine?

Turns out Sam's dippy family has forgotten her 16th B-day in favor of her older sisters impending wedding. She's had to give up her bedroom to her nosey grandparents. The most annoying nerd on the planet is stalking her. Also, super hottie Jake Ryan doesn't know she exists. Bummer!

Can we all agree that Ringworm is awful? She is so damn pouty and whiny. How did she enjoy such fame in the 80's? If you were a fan of hers please follow the following instructions:

1. Get a fork
2. Jam in eye

In classic John Hughes fashion, it all works out in the end. Big sis's wedding gets f'ed up, the nerd gets the Hottie Girl and yup, you guessed it- Ringworm gets Hottie Pants.

Where was Bender through all this? I coulda used him.

I would totally buy this brand...

Awesome, just awesome.

Someone e-mailed this to me, knowing my love of pirates and periods. And really, doesn't every woman want a tampon that wont "keelhaul" her nethers?

*According to the name on the file the artist is ursulav. All credit goes to her/him for this masterpiece.*